Getting Ahead by Standing Still

by | Mar 25, 2017

No one loves to plan more than me. My days are sometimes strategically arranged down to the minute. Working as a school social worker, having a private practice, and teaching meditation workshops make up a pretty full work week. If you’re anything like me, you have probably wished for either more time or a shorter to-do list.

My challenge has always been fitting in the things I enjoy, nurturing meaningful relationships, and making enough time for self-care – and sleep! I can’t tell you how many people have told me that they desperately wanted to add meditation into their life, there was just this one obstacle…time.

Laura Vanderkam says we have time for what we make time for and Arianna Huffington devotes a chapter to the modern epidemic of “time famine” in her book Thrive. “Time famine,” coined by Harvard Professor Leslie Perlow, demonstrates our society’s obsession with not having enough time for everything we feel we must do. Many of us possess this attitude, causing stress and anxiety to build up.

In order to counter this fear of the limitations of time, we must actually take a time-out. Stand still for a moment. Relax, enjoy, savor, recharge. There are 24 hours in a day. That’s 1,440 minutes. If you tell me you can’t find at least 10 to sit in stillness, I will say that you need 20. The clock isn’t the enemy. We have demonized time – like it’s intentionally working against us. It isn’t, we just need to shift our perspective and our priorities, because I know most of us have no problem wasting 15 minutes scrolling through our social media news feeds.

We are obsessed with getting ahead and getting things done. We find it nearly impossible to let it go and let it be. We are afraid we will fall behind, miss something, or lose the race, but by not taking time to sit and connect with ourselves we are completely missing the moment. Life is a string of moments, nothing else. That’s probably on a Hallmark card somewhere and it sounds cheesy, but it is true. Thich Nhat Hahn (I’m really name dropping a lot today) says we excel at preparing to live, however, we’re not so good at actually living. We plan and rush and fix and burn the midnight oil because we think it will bring us happiness, contentment, security, or accomplishment at some point. But what happens when we get there? A whole new race begins.

I am just as guilty of this as anyone else. I am very passionate about my work and there is always something I could be doing. Writing, reading, marketing, planning, etc. It takes mindful awareness on my part when I am pushing my limits. This is one of the ways we create balance in our lives. Mindfulness of our emotional and physical state is always step one. Know yourself, but most importantly, respect yourself.

Think about the next few days. How much of your time do you have devoted to experiencing joy, nurturing your heart, mind, and soul? Now how much time do you have devoted to what you think you “have to” do? Obligations, work, commitments, etc.

It’s completely ironic that we think by stopping to take the time to do things we enjoy – go for a bike ride, watch a sunset, have dinner with a friend, meditate – we will somehow be falling behind. That’s not life. That’s speed-racing to the finish line, which, by the way, is death. Trust me, we will all get there someday, what’s the hurry? What are we rushing for? Where do we think we are going? As soon as we check off everything on our to-do list, we will have a new one by the end of the day. Our relationships are suffering, our health is at-risk, and we’re operating on a robotic autopilot, yet we’re still hesitant to make a change. It’s like we’re being given a magical solution to all of our troubles and we’re skeptical about it. “Peace and joy? Sounds risky. I think I’d rather continue getting 4 hours of sleep per night and feeling irritated.” Taking the time to reconnect with ourselves and the peace that resides within each of us is no longer optional but essential.

This week try to spend just 10 minutes each day (out of 1,440!) in stillness. Find a guided meditation on YouTube, sit on a park bench, download one of the many apps to aid in learning meditation, or follow these basic instructions.

Do this for a week straight and see how it impacts your life. I have a sneaking suspicion you will not regret your time spent meditating, only that you didn’t start incorporating this ancient, life-enhancing practice into your routine sooner.

Written By Cina Hoey

Cina is a licensed therapist, meditation teacher, and energy healer. She is most passionate about blending traditional and non-traditional practices to help her clients achieve peace and healing.

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